Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Meet Your 2014 Detroit Tigers

Every year I do the same stupid routine. I mope around all winter mumbling incoherently to myself about missing baseball. Then the end of February approaches and I get momentarily excited about the beginning of Spring Training only to quickly remember that Grapefruit League baseball is long, pointless, and boring. It’s the ultimate tease to the baseball nerd. I’d rather watch Jim Leyland eat spaghetti with chopsticks for three hours than watch more than ten minutes of a Spring Training game.

But with the arrival of Spring Training are the hopes and dreams of the new season. Is this finally the year for us? Can the Tigers win their first World Championship since 1984? Can Miguel Cabrera win the MVP award yet again? Is this finally the season when the decision makers for the Tigers finally realize the only way Don Kelly should be allowed into Comerica Park is if he is taking Singing Hot Dog Guy’s old job?

The 2014 campaign will begin in a little over a month. Let’s take a quick look at this year’s cast of characters in Detroit and what they have to offer.

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

My 30 Years Watching the Detroit Tigers


As I have mentioned previously, the 2014 season will be my 30th as a Tigers fan. That makes me feel incredibly old typing that. GET OFF MY LAWN.

/starts to finally understand Jerry Green’s babbling

Anyway, before we move forward with what’s ahead this season, I want to reflect on the previous 29 years of Tigers baseball. So do me a favor and join me on this walk down memory lane. There were laughs, tears, anger, elation, and LOTS of beers consumed. I may have cursed once or twice along the way.

As the old saying goes, you can’t know where you’re going until you know where you’ve been. Holy crap, I’m using old sayings. I’m gonna get Alzheimer’s soon, aren’t I?

If I may be further overly dramatic for a second, as a Tigers fan I feel like I’ve been to hell and back following this stupid team. I’m sure many of you have, too.

This is my journey up to this point.

Sunday, February 16, 2014

Happy HOT TAKEZ Anniversary!

Happy anniversary, everyone!

Anniversary of what, you may ask? Well, on this date three years ago, Miguel Cabrera had his infamous drunk driving arrest in Florida. For a full recap of what happened, if you somehow forgot, that’s why Al Gore invented Google.

Immediately after hearing about it, I wrote this. I urge you to check it out if you weren’t with me back then. It was more personal information that I’d normally feel comfortable sharing with strangers on the internet, but I felt I had a unique point of view on the situation and thought it was an intelligent viewpoint on Cabrera’s situation. It may also give you a better idea of what irks me in the words that follow.

Now I’m not here to remind you of this date in Miguel Cabrera’s life that I’m sure he regrets and wishes never happened. No, I’m not here to celebrate that particular anniversary.

You see, this is the anniversary of the day (and week that followed) that I took the final step in my hatred for the majority of the sports media out there. The knee-jerk opinion pieces that followed on Cabrera disgusted me and time has not healed anything. They were the final straw in my ongoing distrust and distain of the majority of the sports media out there.

Today, I want to remind you what the local and national media were saying about Cabrera on those days. HOT SPORTZ TAKES came out in full force. Most took the lazy and ignorant position that anyone that has an incident or two involving alcohol is suddenly an alcoholic. Others got even more high and mighty with their b.s. speculating that Cabrera’s career was in jeopardy and that the Tigers were enablers. Everyone went into full overreaction mode with minimal information.

I mean no one in their 20’s, especially a multi-millionaire from another country, ever does anything stupid after drinking too much, right? Nope. He must have a DISEASE.

These are my “favorites”. I’m not providing links, but if you really want to read the full versions, you can find them still with some effort. Well, most, at least. Henning’s article has been removed from the News site for some reason. Good thing I save stuff!

Anyway, here you go.

Never forget.